Becoming a mum can be a major life change and it takes time to adjust. Time for you is important and not a luxury – happy mum equals happy baby.
To look after and care for others you need to look after yourself first. Be kind to yourself and recognise what you manage to achieve each day. Some days just getting out of bed and getting dressed is a major win.
Self-care and doing things that you enjoy are essential for your wellbeing. You could try and do small things each day to pamper yourself. This could be something as simple as having a cup of tea or coffee in a pretty cup or mug. Or it could be getting outside in the fresh air.
We know how hard it can be sometimes to be a new mum. You may experience a mix of conflicting emotions and it can be a real roller coaster of different highs and lows.
Coping with recovery from child birth, lack of sleep and the new experience of being a mum can be a huge shock to the system.
Many mums put on a brave face when they are struggling, and worry about being judged if they are honest about how they really feel.
If you feel this way you are not alone. The professionals such as your GP, midwife and health visitor (HV) are there to help and support you. They understand the realities of becoming a parent and some of the challenges this can bring. Please reach out and talk to them.
Some ideas for looking after yourself
Remember your health visitor and GP are there to listen and support you. Never feel embarrassed to share how you really feel and ask for help – it is good to talk.
They can also connect you with what is happening in your local community and other mums.
Getting help if you need it
As a new parent you may experience a wide range of emotions from feeling overwhelmed and doubting your ability as a mum, to not feeling close to your baby. It is ok to feel like this, not everyone falls in love with their baby straight away – this can take time.
If you are feeling low, depressed or anxious, talk to your health visitor, midwife and GP. They can support you and offer help.
Useful organisations and resources
Action for Happiness have excellent free resources you can download on how to be happier
ChannelMum offers help and support to mums and has a health visitor and trained parent helpers. It also has free excellent resources for mental health and wellbeing
NHS information about postnatal depression including the signs and symptoms
Tommy’s has information on postnatal anxiety what it is and what you can do about it
You can also find useful information on the fourth trimester (which is the first 12 weeks after birth)
The PANDAS Foundation offers support and advice to any parent and their networks who need support with perinatal mental illness. They help to inform and guide family members, carers, friends, and employers as to how they can support someone who is suffering.
NHS information about practising mindfulness
Free mindfulness apps:
Calm
Headspace
Insight Timer
Unmind
